Control 【Kevin专栏】
Dear Friend, Dear HeartBody,
I want to share a story with you:
Once a very controlling and cunning Man felt he was losing his wife, so he installed untraceable software on his wife's computer and phone, to Monitor every word she wrote.
The Irony of life is that if you feel something is off, you will probably find something that is off. The question is, is what you see really off? Because most times our brain doesn't really see or read what is actually said or written. its our rage of seeking confirmation of an insecure feeling that makes us see something that is not there. And sometimes you find, what you hoped you wouldn’t or didn’t want to find.
This Man discovered his wife was chatting erotically with other men through social media. This disturbed him so much, because he felt those other men were exactly getting the passion and attention he desired so much from his wife. He didn’t see or appreciated the fact that he had her love, he wanted her passion. He wanted something he was unable to give himself. Like most of us, we want something from the other person we are unable to give ourselves.
So very cunningly he created a virtual personality called Robert, and slowly contacted his wife pretending to be Robert.The conversations they had were extraordinary, deep and very sensual. This Men and his Wife were at that period sleeping in separate bedrooms, so actually they were chatting with each other from one room to another at night. Amazingly his wife fell in love with this Robert, even honestly telling her husband that she met a man that completely understood her, that was helping her to become her true self. This man simply was amazing.
You can imagine that this Man felt very proud and hurt at the same time, he knew she was talking to him and was falling in love with him again. Seeing him from a different point of view, but she didn’t know it was him, she thought this was Robert.
The inevitable was going to happen, one night she told Robert ‘I want to see you, please come and pick me up’. The husband had foreseen this already and had made a plan in his head. They would meet in a very romantic place somewhere far away. His wife always wanted to travel. He thought if she would see him there and not Robert she would realize that she had fallen in love with him again, and he would have his wife back.
This is something that happens to all of us, you think by doing or saying something, the other person is going to love it, and react in a certain way. This is an illusion created in your head, its not real. Honestly you will never know, what the other person is feeling or how they will react. Hence so many disappointed people in the world. So when you do something make sure its honest, and that you have no expectations of what is going to happen, you have to do it because it makes you happy, regardless of the outcome.
A few days later the husband became a bit careless and replied and email from his wife as Robert. Normally he would always check if he would send messages and emails from Roberts account. But this time he thought he had send it from Roberts account but by accident he had send it from his own account. You can imagine the shock of his wife receiving an email from Robert but send from her husbands email account. She got so angry with him saying she never wanted to see him again and wanted a divorce.
He lost everything.
The reason I want to share this story is that it has 2 important lessons.
The first one is, the truth will always come out, life will do something or make you do something to make the truth come out. There is no escaping from the truth. No matter how hard you think it is to tell the truth, it will always be easier to deal with honestly on the moment, then when the truth comes out later.
A men planned a trip with his mistress and booked the tickets under Mr. And Misses Smith. When the plain crashed without any survivors the wife got to know her husband was having an affair. The truth will always come out, so better be honest, if you don't want to die in order to make the truth come out...
The second lesson is the more you try to control or hold on to something or someone the greater the change is that you will lose it, no matter how smart or cunning you are.
Love is free, it can’t be controlled owned or possessed. Only things can be controlled, owned or possessed, and love is never a thing. So stop controlling to hold on to something or someone, trust me you will lose it, its inevitable. but if you're able to let love be free, let the one you love be free, you will discover something you couldn't imagine.
You can uptake great wealth but when you die you will lose it all. It's inevitable. but when you share without any purpose, you will discover something beyond your imagination.
Lose control, laugh, cry, live, live with Body and Heart, live fully, feel fully, touch fully, love fully, Be. Be one, be full, be One-body, Be a HeartBody.
Hug,
དཀོན་མཆོག་བསྟན་འཛིན།
